Square, Fresha, Timely, Zenoti—everyone uses them. But following the herd means looking exactly like everyone else. Gordon explains why with scathing wit.
Third Negroni, firelight dancing across Italian leather, that particular hour when truth tastes sweeter than discretion
Square Appointments. Fresha. Timely. Zenoti.
The Big Four, they call them. Everyone uses them. Rather like everyone ordering the house wine because it's printed in bold on the menu—never mind that the sommelier winces slightly when you do.
Swirls glass, watching the light catch
They're popular because they're popular. Delightfully circular logic, that. Self-reinforcing mediocrity. And you'll probably choose one too, won't you? Because stepping outside the herd requires actual thought, and we're all rather busy, aren't we?
Settles deeper into chair
But do allow me to introduce you properly.
Leans forward, elbows on knees, glass dangling between fingers
Ah, Square. The ecosystem enthusiast. "Already use us for payments? Then use us for everything! Scheduling! Invoicing! Marketing! Your firstborn's christening!"
Dismissive wave
Terrifically convenient if you enjoy vendor lock-in. Their "free" tier is free the way a yacht is free if you own the marina. And those processing fees? They accumulate rather like interest on money you didn't know you'd borrowed.
Slight laugh, shaking head
Built their empire on the word "free"—always a promising start in business, that. They'll send you clients from their marketplace. How generous! You'll only pay commission on each one. Including—and this is my favorite part—your existing clients if they book through Fresha instead of ringing you directly.
Rather like paying someone to introduce you to your own mother.
Softens slightly
The interface truly is lovely. Genuinely pleasant to use. They've thought about beauty and wellness specifically, which counts for something.
Pause
Priced per person, though. So growing your team means exponentially growing your software bill. And their online booking? Asks seventeen questions before showing the price. Like a restaurant that won't let you see the menu until you're seated, coated, and halfway through the breadbasket.
Charming.
Sets glass down with deliberate care
Four hundred reports. University courses required to operate it. A mobile app universally described as "using a desktop computer through a keyhole." Twelve-month contracts.
Looks up
If you enjoy reading documentation and have a multi-location medspa empire, you'll be absolutely thrilled.
Picks up glass again
For everyone else... perhaps not.
Rises, walks to the bar, ice tongs catching firelight
Here's the thing about all four of them. They were built for other industries first. Square started with food trucks and retail. Fresha built a marketplace platform. Timely created generic scheduling software. Zenoti tackled enterprise operations.
Fresh ice, fresh pour
Then—and this is the amusing bit—they noticed salons existed and thought, "Well, they probably need software too. Let's just... adapt what we've got."
Your salon isn't a food truck, darling. It's not a yoga studio. It's not a consulting firm.
Returns to chair
But you're using software built for them, with salons awkwardly retrofitted in. Rather like wearing someone else's tailored suit. Sure, you're covered. But it was made for their body, not yours.
Settles back
The sleeves are too long. The shoulders too wide. But everyone else is wearing the same ill-fitting suit, so we call it normal.
Swirls Negroni, studying the amber depths
You know what's extraordinary? We've normalized needing university courses to learn a booking system. Paying commission on our own clients. Locking basic features behind premium tiers.
Looks up, mild amusement
You'll pick one because everyone else did. Because thinking independently is exhausting when you've got color processing in chair three.
Slight shrug
The herd is comfortable. Everyone's making the same mistake together, so it doesn't feel like a mistake anymore.
Leans back, glass nearly empty, that knowing smile
Software built specifically for salons exists, you know. Mobile-first because that's where you actually live. No per-person penalties. No marketplace commissions. No feature hostages. No doctoral programs required to book an appointment.
Slight pause, studying fingernails
But that would require choosing differently from everyone else. And we've already established how exhausting that is.
Drains glass
The Big Four will process your appointments adequately. They'll charge you creatively. They'll function passably.
Perfect for running a perfectly mediocre salon.
Sets glass down with quiet finality
If you're building something exceptional, though—something distinctive rather than derivative—perhaps consider software that wasn't designed for yoga studios and food trucks.
Stands, straightening jacket
Or don't. The herd is always welcoming.
Keep it Gordon.
Gordon: Salon software that isn't designed for food trucks.